Challenges Couples Face After an Affair

A 90-Minute Introductory Training for Counsellors and Therapists

Course Details

Date: Wednesday, 25 March 2026
Time: 11:00 AM NZDT / 9:00 AM AEDT (Sydney)
Duration: 90 minutes
Format: Live online via Zoom
Presenter: Steven Dromgool, MCouns, MNZAC
Recording: A recording will be made available approximately 10–15 days after the live session.
Professional Development: Australian Counselling Association (ACA) OPD approval pending.

About the Course

An affair can have a devastating impact on a relationship, leaving couples struggling with betrayal, broken trust, emotional distress, and uncertainty about their future together.

For therapists, working with couples following infidelity presents some of the most challenging dynamics in relationship counselling. The betrayed partner may experience intense emotional pain, anxiety, hypervigilance, and a profound loss of safety, while the partner who had the affair may struggle with guilt, shame, defensiveness, and uncertainty about how to repair the damage.

These different emotional experiences can create difficult interaction patterns that leave both partners feeling misunderstood, overwhelmed, and stuck.

Challenges Couples Face After an Affair is a 90-minute introductory training designed to help counsellors and therapists better understand the complex emotional and relational challenges that emerge following infidelity.

Drawing on more than two decades of clinical experience working with couples, Steven Dromgool will explore the common difficulties couples face after an affair, why recovery can be so challenging, and what therapists need to understand to work effectively with these couples.

This training provides a foundational introduction to affair recovery and offers a starting point for clinicians interested in developing more specialised skills in this area.

Learning Objectives

By the end of this training, participants will be able to:

Identify common emotional and relational challenges couples experience following the discovery of an affair.

Describe the impact of betrayal on trust, emotional safety, attachment, and relationship stability.

Recognise the differing emotional experiences and recovery needs of the betrayed partner and the partner who engaged in the affair.

Identify common interaction patterns that contribute to ongoing conflict and emotional disconnection following infidelity.

Describe key clinical considerations for therapists working with couples in the early stages of affair recovery.

Key Topics

• Understanding the emotional impact of infidelity
• Betrayal, attachment injuries, and the loss of emotional safety
• The experience of the betrayed partner
• Shame, guilt, and defensiveness in the partner who had the affair
• Why couples experience different recovery timelines
• Common communication and conflict patterns after an affair
• Challenges around disclosure, trust, forgiveness, and intimacy
• The challenges therapists encounter in affair recovery work
• Key considerations for supporting couples through the recovery process

Who Is This Training For?

This course is suitable for counsellors, couples therapists, psychologists, social workers, psychotherapists, and other mental health professionals who want to develop a better understanding of infidelity and its impact on intimate relationships.

It is particularly relevant for therapists beginning to work with couples experiencing affairs, betrayal, and broken trust.

No previous specialised training in affair recovery is required.

About the Presenter

Steven Dromgool, MCouns, MNZAC

Founder and Clinical Director, Relate

Steven Dromgool is the founder and Clinical Director of Relate, one of New Zealand's leading specialist relationship counselling and therapy services.

With more than 20 years of experience working with couples, Steven specialises in helping partners navigate relationship crises, infidelity, betrayal, broken trust, and challenges with emotional and sexual intimacy.

Steven has trained extensively in leading approaches to couples therapy, including the Gottman Method, Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), Imago Relationship Therapy, the Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy (PACT), and the Developmental Model of Couples Therapy.

His professional training has included learning from internationally recognised relationship therapy experts such as John and Julie Gottman, Harville Hendrix, Stan Tatkin, Ellyn Bader, and Peter Pearson.

Steven also led the Relate team in developing Presence Oriented Relationship Therapy (PORT), an integrated approach to couples therapy that has been taught in New Zealand and internationally.

Through his clinical practice and professional training, Steven is passionate about helping therapists develop a deeper understanding of relationship dynamics and practical approaches to supporting couples through complex relational challenges.

Further Training in Affair Recovery

This 90-minute introductory course provides an overview of the challenges couples face following an affair and introduces some of the key clinical issues therapists need to understand.

For clinicians wanting to develop more advanced skills, our 20-hour Affair Recovery Training explores the assessment, treatment planning, clinical interventions, and therapeutic processes involved in supporting couples through infidelity and relationship repair.

The extended training is designed to help therapists move beyond understanding the challenges of affair recovery toward developing the practical skills and confidence needed to work with these complex presentations.